Crossoverstaffed
by LoamLapse
Summary: The whole mess started when a stranger arrived in Beacon Academy. Then it never stopped when more and more kept coming. A little oneshot I wrote about the concept of what would happen if all those RWBY / whatever crossover stories happened in the same universe at the same time.


"So allow me to ask you, why Beacon?" The headmaster raised his eyebrows slightly, before lifting the white porceline mug over his lips. Opposite to him the teen seized stretching his right arm towards the lamp, curling his gloved palm into a fist over it as if to snatch the source of light into his grasp.

"The libraries in the city didn't really have much on this "aura", atleast nothing actually scientific." The boy scoffed as his arm lowered,  
unlike his eyes which were still transfixed to the lamp above him.

"Fairytales and folklore don't interest me. I want actual data and research notes on it. Your academy trains soldiers to combat evil with the power of the soul, so I don't think it a stretch to assume that you have atleast something on it." His gaze finally met with the headmaster's. The young man was right of course, though Atlas' science division was several years ahead of Vale, the combination of their own inquiries into the matter and what ever documents James would declassify by the years certainly amounted to atleast a few weeks worth of reading.

Not that Ozpin would even for a moment suspect that the boy wouldn't to go through every single log and note, his golden eyes burned with a hunger for knowledge and an unwavering conviction.

"So why do you require this information?" Ozpin asked.

"I believe my research into this "aura" can help me get back home." The boy replied bluntly, before looking down at the ground somberly. After a moment he  
took a deep breath, narrowed his eyes and continued speaking in a soft but determined tone of voice.

"I'm not of this world and I have people waiting for me to come back. Please help me." Ozpin smiled at the reply.

That was refreshing atleast, to hear that one in a dozen that tells the truth rather than try to tell tales of being born in a village far beyond the modern civilization. Were he to actually start putting all these "villages" on a single map, soon enough there'd be a whole civilization hidden in the fifth, assumedly uninhabited continent of Remnant.

"Very well then." Ozpin let out. "We do have material that I believe would interest you and in time I will grant you the access to it."  
The teen smiled satisfied at these words. He offered his hand towards him, bending his upper half over the desk.

"It's a deal then?" Ozpin rose from his chair to reach the boys hand and shook it. It felt not dissimilar to James' grip, just as cold. Just as metallic.  
The boy had no right arm. Not a natural one atleast. That would have struck him odd a week ago, but with the recent happenings,  
it didn't even make him pause for thought.

"Yes. Welcome to Beacon, Professor Elric."

/-/

As the young "man" in his red coat walked past Glynda into the elevator, the headmaster's shoulders sagged along with his enthusiastic expression he had been holding up until now. Seeing this, the deputy sighed.

"Another professor?" She queried, as if she needed the confirmation. When none came, she let out another, longer sigh. "What subject?"

"Alchemy." The deputy simply wrote the foreign word down into her scroll and set a notification to appear in two hours time.

She'd have to reschedule the lessons _again_.

There was a moment of silence, during which the deputy wished the older man would apologize. But he didn't. Instead he poured himself another cup of coffee, after pointing the pot towards her briefly, to which she had simply shook her head unenergetically.

"Was he even an adult?" The deputy finally broke the silence, timing the question just as the headmaster lowered his mug again.

"He told me he was." Even if he had been sitting in that chair straightbacked, his stature wouldn't have fooled anyone. Even Qrow's niece was taller than him, if only by a little.

"How many more for today?" Glynda met his eyes, before checking her scroll that had just unfolded into the size of a tablet.

"Three more interviews." The headmaster was about to point out that number was the exact same one as the one she had told him right before his earlier session, but she seemed to catch the meaning in his slightly widened eyes and hurried to continue.

"The third one appeared just five minutes ago. Young lady in a yellow military outfit." The man dressed in green let out a weary sigh.

"What was she like?"

"As confused as she was heavily armed. Doctor Oobleck is giving her the speech right this moment. I'll send the next one up." With that, the deputy left the headmaster to hold his head in his hands.

/-/

 **"IIIIII DOOOOON'T GEEEEET IIIIIT!"**

Weiss Schnee gritted her teeth at the shrill whine. If Ruby wouldn't shut up, she'd hurl the desk at her next. She wasn't Yang, but any huntress worth their salt could throw their own weight for more atleast a dozen feet. If they couldn't, what hope would they have piercing an alpha's skin with their weapons? As Ruby's annoyed breaths turned into defeated sniffs, the heiress' fury she had been bravely holding back deflated into annoyed compassion.

Her teammate, leader and friend needed her.

"Ruby, do you need a hand?" The young reaper sniffed again, apparently not aware just how distinct and loud the sound was. "Y-yes."

The heiress rose from her seat, walked over to her partner and sat down on the floor next to her. Winter would have words for dirtying her student uniform like that, but she wasn't here. Not currently. She apparently had taken an assignment in "Surveillance" since the last they'd spoke, so she was in the city.

"So, what don't you get?" Ruby sniffed again, pointing at a complex diagram she had copied by hand from the latest lesson. Weiss hummed and hummed, until she could hum no longer.

"Honestly speaking, I don't think you'll need to remember this one, expecially if you've managed to draw it so well." She complimented on the image. She didn't even need to lie. The various lines spread all over the crudely drawn human body representing the currents of ki, chakra, aura and whatever else types of lifeforces and soul energies had been recently discovered to reside in the human body were all drawn in their correct places, as far as Weiss could remember atleast.

 _I think so atleast._ She wasn't entirely sure. There were so many now.

"You think so?" Ruby shifted gear to upbeat.

"Yes. Don't worry, I'll explain it all to you if the teachers bring any of these up again." She assured her the best she could. Ruby had been so down lately,  
what with all the new subjects appearing on the syllabus like mushrooms in a garden after a long rainy day. She found she couldn't exactly blame Ruby  
for not being able to keep up, she herself was right now struggling to understand the basics of what she'd scribbled down during the psionics class.

"Thanks Weiss. You're the best." The girl in red smiled. It must have been infectious because Weiss found herself grinning too. Their shared moment was cut short when the opening quitar riff to "This will be the day" started blaring from the younger girl's scroll.

"Hello?" The reaper in red replied. Her sister sighed on the other side of the call.

 _-"Ruby, how many times do I have to tell you it's not a phone, it's a scroll." -_

"A scroll's a phone too." Ruby spat the words out as she quickly let it fall from the side of her head to infront of her. Weiss rolled her eyes.  
Such a Patch-thing to say.

Can it measure and display your aura? No? A phone. Yes? A scroll.

 _\- "Where are you two? Dark arts class is gonna start in five minutes!" -_ The blonde girl's eyes had already started to shift towards the red territory.

Before Ruby could launch off to the hallway and spread those damned rosepetals all over their dormroom, Weiss grabbed her by the collar to stop her from building the momentum.

"Yang, defence against dark arts got cancelled today after that particular teacher went on a mission with JNPR. So calm down, Xiao-Long, we've g-"

 _\- "No, it's another new prof, guy's called Constantine or something. I'm not talking about defence against dark arts, it's just_ _dark arts_ _." -_

With that, the heiress' hand dove hastily into her pocket to bring up her own scroll. Pulling it out, she quickly navigated to her team's class schedule.  
 _Oh-oh. She's right._

That lesson hadn't been there a few hours ago. Neither that one. Or that one. And that one isn't even an actual word.  
Turning towards Ruby and the slab of seethrough plastic, Weiss looked equal parts exhausted and quizzical.

"What on remnant is " _Alchemy_ "?"

/-/

"It was a _pleasure_ , gentlemen." Ozpin replied dryly. That it had not been at all. As the holographic screen fizzled out of existance, he was left in the darkness of his office. There was not a noise, not a light. Such peace was not meant to last long. Soon he heard the elevator's cheery ping as Ms. Goodwitch marched through the opening metal doors.

"Council, I take it?" She looked patiently at her employer.

"They're growing tired of my recent hirings." Glynda pursed her lips together for a moment, before she finally found her courage.

"You are being far too lackadaisical hiring these new professors, half of them have baggage and secrets that you haven't even tried to pry in fear of turning them away."

"We both know that they bring valuable combat techniques, technologies and knowledge from their worlds. We can't let afford to let them fall into the enemy hands." Ozpin said, steepling his fingers.

"Just a few hours ago a seventeen year old boy walked into Beacon and reduced one of our bullhead flightcontrol towers into rubble by pointing his finger at it. Fifteen minutes later another clapped his hands together and undid all the damage so that he could earn an audience with me."

 _ **\- CRASH! -**_

He didn't even bother to look through the massive windows of his office, instead leaning over to the microphone built into his desk. "Professor Port, could you please find out what that was? Thank you." He took a deep breath, before turning back towards his most trusted employee.

"As I was saying, I don't think we can afford to turn back _any_ potential allies." Glynda cocked an eyebrow, slowly turning her head to the spot slightly  
behind her, where the massive pool of blood and the footprints that lead from it to the elevator resided.

"Glynda, please try to unde-"

"HE WAS COVERED IN _BLOOD_!" She shouted. "HEAD TO TOE, _DRENCHED_ IN IT!" Ozpin sighed. Yes, he'd have to get a cleaner to come up here.

"HE ARRIVED ON SCHOOL GROUNDS WITH A BLUNDERPUSS IN ONE HAND AND A CLEAVER IN ANOTHER! SOAKED IN BLOOD!" Ozpin weathered the storm raging in his room. A quite literal one, as her exasperation was causing her semblance to run wild.  
There was an upside to having an unfurnished office.

"I know Glynda, which was why I didn't hire him as a prof-"

"But you did as a _groundskeeper_!" Her voice was no longer quite so furious, but she was upset enough. Her glare could cut diamonds right now. "We've never had a groundskeeper before, and now we have six!"

"You're right Glynda. Perhaps we should have detained him, but then he might have acted uncontrollably and it's obvious the man was both  
willing and capable of killing, atleast this way we can keep an eye on him."

"Keep an eye on him?" Glynda laughed darkly. "Bartholomew and Winter can barely stay awake, watching all the cameras, Qrow had to be recalled so we could keep an eye on the more risky employees, how many more eyes do we have to keep watch of them?" Ozpin nearly raised his finger to suggest they could use some of the new professors, but that would very likely get her to start shouting again. He corrected the motion to cup the side of his face, to rub an invisible stuble as he thought.

"I'm sorry." He let out. Glynda's face softened. This was unusual.

"I wish there was a better way, but all these talents, powers, techniques and technologies, we can't let the _Queen_ have them,  
just imagine what would happen if they got their hands on even a few of them." Ozpin removed his glasses. "That would be a nightmare scenario."

/-/

"I need your clothes, your-" _**FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSH!**_

Before the tall man could finish his request, the woman in the wine-red dress had melted it's head into a puddle that was right now making it's way towards the pavement in tiny, sizzling droplets. She smothered the bright orange flame in her hand, wisps of black smoke escaping between her fingers.

The naked person's grip loosened around Mercury's throat, allowing him to pull himself free finally. The teen struggled to breath, coughing violently while rubbing his windpipe.  
As the six-feet terror fell to it's side, Mercury gave it a kick to the stomach, not so much to ensure it was actually dead but just out of pure spite.

He would have thanked Cinder weren't it for the fact that she looked like she would burn him alive if he uttered even a word. Her eyes were both glowing bright and darkened in rage at the same time. If she tried tpo clench her teeth together any harder, they'd shatter. She was under a lot of stress right now.

"Over here!" Roman sounded, opening a door in the nearby alley. They really could use the breather. Running through the darkening streets of Vale, it sounded like a warzone. The police sirens, the sound of gunfire, explosions, the shouting, this whole district had gone insane.

And this time it wasn't even because of the kids from Beacon, no sir. This was something entirely different. It was like the entire universe was in on this grand joke at their expense. And the bloody joke wasn't funny in the slightest bit.

It wasn't the cops they were hiding from, nor the massive amount of huntsmen and huntresses currently converging on the location of the disturbance.  
It wasn't even the entire battalion of those new recruits or teachers or whatever Ozpin had let into Beacon that seemed to get attracted to fights and odd happenings like flies to fresh dung. It was the disturbance itself they were running from.

Oh, it had started so wonderfully, they had been discussing their plan to ruin Vale's big day, when suddenly a fricking knight glowing darkened red had appeared in the room, demanding to know where the host of something or other was currently. Cinder had seen the opportunity in the warriors obsession with his quarry and in no time had the two of them struck a deal, ensuring a fruitful alliance.

Then just half an hour later a cloaked creature had wandered into their hideout, in search of his very own nemesis. Before they had properly introduced themselves to the cloaked figure brandishing a twig towards them like it had been a weapon, another one in a rather similar outfit had materialized seemingly from thin air. For a moment, they had wondered if the two had possibly come from the same place if judging by their outfits, but that changed the moment the new arrival pulled out a weapon that rivaled even the huntsmen's most advanced weaponry, that blade of light had cleaved right through the White Fang grunt idiotic enough to wander near him.

It took them a while, not to mention the deaths of more than a few White Fang mooks, but they managed to restore order in their warehouse, coming into a shaky agreement with their current guests.

And then more came. An hour later the building had been filled with confused, angry and bored evil-doers. For a moment Cinder had actually thought it a good thing, collapsing into a villanous laughing fit as she looked at her growing army. And then a few more came. A few too many, to be exact.

 _Arrogant, half-naked warriors in skullmasks unwilling to ally themselves with anyone who wouldn't kneel before them. Insane, regenerating psychopaths who moved faster than the eye could track, heavily armed killer robots that could not be reasoned with..._

Mercury knew not which one of the dozens upon dozens of villains fired the first shot, but the moment it was fired the whole warehouse  
became a carnage as they fell upon one another. Fire, lightning, lead and beams of light showered the entire warehouse interior like the place's sprinklers had been set to deal death in case of an emergency. At this point, they had decided to evacuate. Right after reaching the outside, the building had collapsed under it's own weight from all the damage to it's walls, but had that stopped the fight?

For a moment, yes. They had simply climbed out of rubble and smoking ruins, proclaiming to one another their enemies foolish if they think such a thing could kill them.  
Some of them had laughed, some had mocked one another and some of them had simply readied their weapons. Then the fight had resumed.

Mercury returned to the present as the door swung open and what looked like a heavily armored spacesuit crashed through the doorframe, muttering and grunting to himself, pointing a large weapon with a very sharp looking curved blade sticking out of it. The golden visor in the round helmet turns towards them, but before Mercury can even get on his feet, Emerald's doing her thing.

 _Distracting it._ In time too, as the mumbling lunatic's aim starts shifting away from them to the back of the room, his weapon spits out an explosive that tears half the room to pieces. _Even with aura that one would have hurt like hell._

It doesn't take Cinder long to dispose of the distracted foe and soon enough an arrow sticks out of where an arrow would not be considered healthy to be sticking out of. As they walk out of the ruined building, Roman points at a bullhead on a nearby rooftop.  
In silent agreement and with weary expressions they all make towards their escape vehicle.

 _Vacuo's apparently lovely this time of year._

A flash of light on their right, the entire fleeing group passes the confused man dressed in a darkish gray pinstripe suit that seems to be far too tight for him,  
ignoring his demands to be told where he is.

 _Yes. Maybe this is just happening in Vale._

The grayhaired teen just narrowly avoids a portal as it opens right before him, spewing out black, slimy things with elongated heads. They hiss as they give chase.

 _Surely there is no way all these nutjobs are fated to find us?_

A couple masked figures with dreadlocks appear out of nowhere, but thankfully they seem less interested in him than what ever grimm just appeared earlier.

 _Surely not?_

As they round the corner, Torchwick nearly gets smacked to the face with a crowbar when a man in a cheap looking roostermask swings at him, but the thief's partner is far quicker, neutralizing the threat before he can go for a second swing.

 _Please?_

* * *

 **So that was that, a little brainfart that amused me. Perhaps it's not the smartest thing, but I got a chuckle out of it, and hopefully someone else did too.**

 **Should've propably started this section by saying I have absolutely nothing against the crossover trope of a character coming to Beacon and**  
 **joining as a student/teacher/Ozpin's lackey, it works. It's fine. As I read those, I started noticing recurring themes like characters trying to**  
 **lie about their origin, befriending Ruby first out of all the students and sooner or later running into their villain from their own story.**

 **Again, I think that works, it lets the writers mix and match with the personalities, motives and powers of the cast of RWBY and whatever the story is crossing with it. I personally don't mind how a story structures itself as long as it's fun to read.**

 **The reason I wrote this was when I wondered what would happen if all those crossovers would happen in the same universe, in roughly the same time period. It would be utter chaos for both sides as Beacon suddenly has more alien talent than it could possibly hope for, while all the villains of the**  
 **heroes' and protagonists' worlds would obviously follow them to Remnant, all of them just naturally ending up in Cinder's payroll. A few of them she could**  
 **manipulate into doing her bidding, but what about when that dusty old warehouse gets too crowded to comfortably move around in?**

 **That thought amused me enough to write this, and it was amusing to write too, apart from the final part which felt like I was just trying to tie up the knot.**

 _Funny thing, I originally wanted to write a section where team RWBY would have gotten to see the first arrivals_ _appearing around Beacon one after another, with Ruby gaining and losing interest in them like a dog that's had far too many_ _new toys thrown at it at once to concentrate on any of them properly. That section then turned into a bit with Ruby trying to fit socializing with_ _all the new characters' into her week, which didn't really amuse me as much as the thought of how arduous a student's life would become_  
 _the moment new classes and courses would start pouring on them._

 _I also ditched the part where Ozpin asks Glynda to interview the final one for the day so  
that he can get some well-deserved shut-eye, only to have someone appear in his room as he is just about turn in for the night._

 **Whether you made it this far or just skipped the whole wall of text, good on you. I may have gone a bit overboard with this epilogue thingie.**


End file.
